Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Parents And Kids - The Things They Say

If there was a competition to figure out who was more mad, my parents or my kids, it would be a close call. Just look at the statements and questions I've had to brilliantly defend myself against in the last few days:

"Can we bring a book?" (you know the history here)

"This is the night you were made" - My Mum told me this "euuughr" inducing bit of information when I rang to wish the 'rents a happy anniversary last week. There are some things that I just do not want to know.

"Have you got a lead with a banana plug at one end and a Jack plug on the other?" asked my Dad. There was only one reasonable reply, which I gave

"What do you think I am, a greengrocer?"

"What's a blog?" asked my maternal unit.

"So what's Facebook then?" she followed it up with.

"And then what's Twitter?" she followed that up with.

I answered with patience and just the right amount of condescension, knowing full well that she'll have forgotten the answers before most of the world had updated their Twitter status anyway.

"I'm going to report you to social services" - said K when I refused to let her eat my Magnum Chocolate Indulgence ice lolly, after she has already eaten her one.

Later that evening, after I'd dropped the girls home I settled myself to eat aforementioned Magnum bar. It was an "advert" moment. Me, the Magnum, the river outside and the sun setting as I unwound and mellowed.

Only I dropped the fucking thing and the chocolate smashed into smithereens, lots of them. K, on hearing about this the next day, thought it was funny.

Parents and kids eh.

I'm glad I'm not one.

12 comments:

kalusudda said...

Don't feel bad, mine showed me the place where I was made err the accident may have happened. Dutch Antilles ;)
About the Choco, I too would have laughed!

Lady divine said...

how sure are you about that last line? :P

Anonymous said...

I personally think its impressive that your mum knew about Twitter.

Natalie said...

wouldnt you just love to hear what K and A have to say about you? :)

Rhythmic Diaspora said...

KS - Yes, but some things go immediately into that "too much info" category and that was one.

Anon - Of course you do, you haven't met her!

Natalie - No! not after hearing what they say in front of me.

Anonymous said...

Hehe! I'm glad I'm not one too! Nice post!

Sach said...

Your mom asked what a blog is?
Holy!
I pray she won't find out about this one. Or maybe... hmmm... it won't be that bad, would it?

Sachini said...

Let me get this right. Your parents made you their wedding night itself? Boy, they worked fast!

Rhythmic Diaspora said...

Cynical Sach - look, I'm uncomfortable enough about this as it is, but supposedly yes. I DO NOT want to ask for any more details and cringe to even think about it.

Anne said...

The RD family seems quite productive.
Day 1 - made son no 1
N years - made another son ??

Rested for M years.

Son No 1
Day 1- made a daughter
n years made yet another daughter

new chick - may be more new kids

Facinating stuff.


Son no 2

we have no idea

Rhythmic Diaspora said...

Anne - Erm, thanks for the comment.

Gypsy said...

Ok can I just say that comment above was the weirdest thing ever :P